One of the most interesting and accidental social experiments I ever took place in, was the two weeks I walked around with a black eye.
Now I know what you’re thinking; “Someone finally punched that loud mouth in the face.”
Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but that’s not exactly what happened.
I was getting ready for work one Saturday morning when I noticed my dog, Bubba, all cuddled up on my bed. So, I went over to give him some kisses and a belly rub.
Luna, who was downstairs at the time, heard what was going on, using her super-doggie-hearing-powers. Excited, she ran her 110-lb solid muscle self, full speed up the stairs.
But instead of jumping on the bed, like a normal dog would have done, she launched from the doorway to the top of the bed. At the height of her jump, the top of her head smashed into my cheekbone (zygomatic arch – for the nerdy :-).
As I lay on the floor thinking “oh yeah, that’s gonna leave a mark” I could hear my husband laughing as he was awoken with a flurry of dog kisses. I made my way into the bathroom and checked my face for discoloration. I was surprised to see there wasn’t any. With that, I was off to work.
The day went by as usual. I felt as if my cheek was bruised but with no visible marks, I figured it would just subside. Then I woke up the next morning…..
Gazing into my husbands eyes he looked at me and said “WOW, you need to look in the mirror.”
“Just go look.”
“My jaw dropped!! Just above that aching cheekbone was bruising! My crazy dog had given me my first (and so far, only) black eye.
As I headed into work the next day my co-workers weren’t too surprised to see the bruising. The first question I got was “What did Luna do?” Ironically at the time I was training at an MMA gym, but my crazy puppy stories outweighed any other hobbies I might have had.
Interacting with the rest of society proved a very different experience. I was not prepared for how uncomfortable people would be around me. I would walk to the spa lounge to pick up clients and notice the uncomfortable stares full of curiosity and pity. Why did everyone just assume I deserved pity? It was not what I expected at all.
One of my clients, an older southern woman, saw my face, and without hesitation said, “Well, good lord child who done punched you in the eye?” I laughed at her complete comfort and candor delivering the question everyone in that room wanted the answer to. I know they did, because I watched them all perk up in their seats looking at me and waiting to see if they would believe the answer I was about to give.
So I told my story. Some of my co workers chimed in about how I always have stories about my crazy dog. I could sense relief in the room.
Heading outside the safety of my work place, with hubby in tow, was even MORE interesting. We received some hostile energy and nasty looks. It amazed me that everyone just assumed he had hit me. I am not a weak little person! We really couldn’t go anywhere without people passing a judgmental eye (all while not having any guts to ask what had actually happened.)
It was a bit fun to go out in to the world and try to figure out what people where thinking as they stared at the little blonde girl with the big black eye. I sometimes forgot it was even there. Like a tattoo you’ve have had awhile – you forget about it until someone makes a comment. I would walk into a store like all is wonderful and then get THE LOOK. It became entertaining.
But to this day, I wonder… Did any of them assume I won the fight? Did any of them make me the hero in the story? Or was I just some weakling getting pushed around at home? If I could go back in time, I think I would have spoken up. I would have just asked them, “so, whatdya think?”
By the end of the third day my husband asked me to please start wearing all my clothes from ‘The Pit’ because he didn’t want to be stared at like he was a wife beater. So I did. With the addition of Arnica and Vitamins to help the bruising heal faster. I continued with my regimen of natural healing and within two weeks my face had cleared up.
It was definitely one of those injuries that looked a lot worse than it felt. Similar to the time I got shot point blank range with a paintball gun…